BLOG: Who's the biggest influence on your teen's life? You!

In this article, you will find:

• Why and when teens take risks with drugs and alcohol
• How you as the parent can counteract dangerous risk-taking
• Where to turn locally to learn more about talking to your teen about drugs and alcohol

All parents are aware of the change in attitude that occurs during the summer and various school breaks. Kids get restless and long for stimulation. Unfortunately, their brains are not fully developed and, worse yet, the part where reason, risk assessment and judgment reside is last to make all of its connections.

Combine this with less parental supervision, the feeling of being indestructible and access to alcohol and other drugs, and it’s no wonder more teenagers have their first initiation with alcohol and drugs during the summer and school breaks. And we all know that quitting our job and sitting by their side all summer long is not an option.

YES, YOU ARE THE PARENT

So what can we do? First, it’s important for us to remember that we are, in fact, their parents and not their friends. As such, we have the responsibility to keep them safe, even from themselves, until they’ve had the time to fully develop their critical thinking skills.

If you haven't already had the opportunity to establish a good line of communication with your teen, this will be more difficult. But it can still be done.

MOST TEENS DON'T DRINK OR USE DRUGS

Next, we need to educate ourselves and our teens. There is another old adage, “When we know better, we do better.”

Learn about the effects of early initiation. Educate yourselves on the devastation of alcohol and drug use on the developing brain, both short and long term. Explain that although it may feel to your teen like all their friends engage in underage drinking and/or drug use, most don’t. In fact, 80 percent of Palm Beach County teens reported not drinking during a 30-day period while 90 percent reported not using marijuana.

YOU ARE THE BIGGEST INFLUENCE ON YOUR CHILD

Furthermore, you need to understand that all of the influences in a child’s life, YOU are the biggest. Make sure your children know where you stand on drug and alcohol use, and have a family policy on these issues.

As mentioned earlier, you are the parent. You have the right to ask where they going, who they are going to be with, what they plan to do and when will they return. You have the right to check their phone, to see where they’ve been, to look at their text messages. Again, you’re the parent and you’re probably paying for that phone.

Remind them how much you love them and how they have a long life ahead of them, full of opportunity. And while it may sound cliché, one bad decision can alter their lives.

Many parents already have these practices and policies in place. However, we understand if you're concerned how adopting these strategies will change your relationship with your teen. But if you include them in the process by educating and informing them along the way, your relationship will change for the better.

 Palm Beach County Behavioral Health Coalition is a local advocacy group created to give parents and youths the tools to live drug and smoke free.